LIFE’S LESSONS
By Henrylito D. Tacio
“In our appetite for gossip, we tend to gobble down everything before us, only to find, too late, that it is our ideals we have consumed, and we have not been enlarged by the feasts but only diminished.” – Pico Iyer
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Believe it or not, the tongue is the most powerful tool a human being possesses. Allow me to share this story penned by John Koster to prove my point:
The king ordered his slave, Aesop, to invite many guests for dinner and to serve the best food that money could buy.
The first course of the meal consisted of tongues cooked in different ways and served with appropriate sauces. This gave rise to much mirth among the guests.
Then the second, third, and fourth courses were also nothing but tongue. This seemed to go beyond a joke and so the king angrily demanded of Aesop why he hadn’t followed orders and bought the choicest dainties that money could buy.
And Aesop, in self-defense, explained: “What excels the tongue? It is the channel of learning and wisdom. By it addresses and eulogies are made, business is carried out, contracts are made, marriages are contracted, and great men are made known. With our tongue, we speak to God. Nothing – but nothing – is equal to the tongue.”
All the guests applauded Aesop’s wit and wisdom and the good feeling was restored.
As the guests were leaving, the king said to them, “Come back tomorrow. I want to make up for today.” And the king ordered Aesop to go out and find the worst kind of meat he could.
The following day came. The guests again assembled and to their and the king’s astonishment, only tongue was served. The king called Aesop aside and told him, “Didn’t I tell you to serve the worst meat you could? Why is it that we have tongues again?”
Aesop, with a straight face, responded, “My Lord, can there be anything worse than the tongue? Is there any wickedness under the sun that it does not take part in? Treasons, deaths, violence, injustices, fraud, murder, thieveries, wars – all are debated and resolved upon by the tongue. The tongue ruins empires and countries, peoples, and families. What, my Lord king, is worse than the tongue?”
Gossip
This brings us to the subject of gossip. When it comes to gossip, the Holy Bible uses tongue to symbolize it. James 3:5-6: “The tongue is a small part of the body, but it makes great boasts. Consider what a great forest is set on fire by a small spark. The tongue is also a fire, a world of evil among the parts of the body. It corrupts the whole person, sets the whole course of his life on fire, and it itself is set on fire by hell.”
“Gossip,” novelist George Elliot once wrote, “is a sort of smoke that comes from the dirty tobacco-pipes of those who diffuse it; it proves nothing but the bad taste of the smoker.” Joseph Conrad states: “Gossip is what no one claims to like, but everybody enjoys.”
Bestselling author Erica Jong considers gossip as “the opiate of the oppressed.” Sholom Aleichem describes gossip as “nature’s telephone.” Walter Winchell has this idea: “Gossip is the art of saying nothing in a way that leaves practically nothing unsaid.”
“Gossip is one of the so-called ‘little’ sins that even Christians are often unable or unwilling to avoid,” said William McElroy. “It is, to be sure, a common sin, but can it truly be called ‘little’? Gossip can destroy reputations, disrupt families, divide neighbors, and cause widespread heartbreak, and all to no purpose except the satisfaction that some find in passing on idle or malicious tales.”
Pope Francis himself said, “The person who gossips is a terrorist who drops a bomb, destroys, and they destroy others.”
It takes two or more people to gossip. It is not only the person who brings those malicious talks guilty but also those who listen as well. “There cannot be a noise unless there is an ear to hear it,” explained Dr. Charles L. Allen, author of God’s Psychiatry. “A noise is caused by the vibrations of the ear drums. And neither can there be a bit of gossip without an ear to hear. The law holds the receiver of the stolen goods as guilty as the thief.”
Do not judge, or you too will be judged
Oftentimes, people who gossip about other people don’t mean to hurt those people. They think of talebearing as a bit of harmless pastime. But by talking of what those people have done, the gossiper is already judging them. And what Matthew 7: 1-2 said: “Do not judge, or you too will be judged. For in the same way you judge others, you will be judged, and with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.”
Once upon a time, there were three priests who came together in a park. While talking with each other, they started to reveal their innermost secrets. “I have used the church’s money in building my mother’s house,” bared the first priest. “Please don’t tell anyone about this.”
“My problem is,” the second priest revealed, “I have impregnated a beautiful lady. She will deliver our baby soon.” Like the first priest, he urged that it, too, should be kept a secret.
“What about you?” the two asked the third priest.
“Mine is not really that immense,” he said. “I just can’t control my tongue. You see, when I hear some secrets, I can’t help myself but share them with others.”
Steve Maraboli in his Life, the Truth, and Being Free penned: “How would your life be different if…You walked away from gossip and verbal defamation? Let today be the day…You speak only the good you know of other people and encourage others to do the same.” – ###