LIFE’S LESSONS
By Henrylito D. Tacio
“God gave you a gift of 84,600 seconds today. Have you used one of them to say thank you?” ― William Arthur Ward
***
Last December, during the holiday season, I received several gifts – from friends, colleagues, and family members. Just five days after the New Year’s celebration, I accepted numerous gifts again; the reason: it was my birthday.
I think people who have given gifts expect those who receive them to be acknowledged. A text message may be the best way and fastest way. Or a post in the person’s Facebook account or through messenger may likewise do the trick.
But the best way is still to talk with the person face-to-face. Or if time doesn’t warrant it, you can always call the person who gave you a gift.
But how soon should you do that acknowledgement? “As soon as possible,” wrote Alyson Ward of McClatchy Newspapers. “Writing within a few days is ideal. A few weeks is acceptable. After that, it gets sticky. But how late is too late? Never, etiquette experts tell us. Just because it’s been six months, you’re not off the hook. No matter how long it’s been, you still received a kind gift – and you’re probably still grateful. What a load off your guilty mind to simply write the note.”
Difficulty to express gratitude
Belgian painter and writer Erik Pevernagie reminded, “‘Thank you’ might be the hardest words to say. We may wonder, what can be so castrating about embracing gratitude? Some think it causes fear of loss, while it unleashes indistinct anxiety of losing independence or self-control. Gratefulness might come down to an undying struggle against oblivion. It could amount to a lasting burden for maintaining the infallibility of their memory. In short, for some, thankfulness is a box of Pandora.”
That word “thank” needs scrutiny. In “This Book is Not FOR SALE”, author Jarod Kintz wrote: “I guess I should be thankful. Full of thank. But what is thank? I can’t eat thank, so I know my stomach isn’t full of thank. I can’t smell or breathe thanks, so I know my lungs aren’t full of thank. I’m not even sure how much thank I could fit in the trunk of my car. But I do know one thing. It’s much easier to give thanks than something that actually costs money to give.”
Thankfulness to Dennis Quaid
Some years ago, I had the opportunity of visiting my sister in Livingston, Montana (they now live in Grand Rapids, Minnesota). I stayed for almost a month, and when it was time to return back to the Philippines, she had to drive me for more than an hour to bring me to the airport in Bozeman.
After checking in, we had a sumptuous lunch together. We talked for a few minutes before she bade goodbye. I was alone at the airport. Now, I was ready to enter the departure area but before that, I had to undergo the routine check-up.
I was busy trying to find my papers when I noticed that the person before me was Hollywood actor Dennis Quaid (yes, the lead star of The Day After Tomorrow and The Parent Trap, to name a few). Next to him was an old lady carrying some heavy bags. “Can I carry some of them?” Dennis inquired.
The lady looked at him for a few minutes. “Sure,” she replied, and gave him her other bag. When we were inside the waiting area, the lady came to Dennis and said, “Thank you very much for helping me.”
Good etiquette
“In normal life we hardly realize how much more we receive than we give, and life cannot be rich without such gratitude. It is so easy to overestimate the importance of our own achievements compared with what we owe to the help of others,” wrote Dietrich Bonhoeffer in Letters and Papers from Prison.
“Saying thank you is more than good manners. It is good spirituality,” said Alfred Painter. William Shakespeare, the touted Father of English literature, also said, “I can no other answer make, but, thanks, and thanks.”
“Thank you” may be simply said but to a person receiving the compliment, it means a lot. “Every morning of the world I give thanks for all the wonderful things in my life,” a young man declared enthusiastically. “And do you know something? It’s strange indeed, but the more I give thanks, the more I have reason to be thankful. For, you see, blessings just pile up on me one after another like nobody’s business.”
“None of us are ever too busy to pay his way,” said David Dunn. “It takes only a few seconds to say a heart-warming ‘Thank you.’”
Look at former American President Theodore Roosevelt, who lived a more hurried and hectic life. Even on political campaign trips, when he was so busy and could hardly take a deep breath, he would excuse himself to go to small people and talk with them for a few seconds. It was his custom before leaving his private train to thank the engineer and fireman for a safe and comfortable trip. “It took but a fraction of a minute of his time, but he had two more friends for the rest of his life,” Dunn said.
“Good politics,” most people say. “But good living too,” added Dunn. “For, after all, isn’t having friends the basis of happy living, as well as of successful politics?”
Gratefulness for blessings
Dunn continued, “Nor have I found any situation in which thanks cannot be given. You can thank even total strangers with a nod of the head, a gesture of the hand, a grateful glance – in jostling street crowds, in swaying subway trains, at the theatre, in the quiet of a church service, anywhere at all, if you heart is saying, ‘Thank you.’”
Yes, we seldom pause to give thanks for the simple blessings of life. “One reason is that we are used to having so much,” Richard B. Douglas contends. “We simply assure that we will have all the good things in life.
“Another reason is that it hurts our pride to be grateful,” Douglas continues. “We do not want to admit that God is the Provider of all good things. We are simply His stewards. Being thankful requires humility and faith in God. When we have these, we can be grateful.”
Give thanks before it is too late
If you have to thank someone, do it now – before it’s too late. Do not wait for tomorrow for that day may not come anymore.
There was this case of a widow who had spent long days and hours in the factory and at home raising her four children. Now, she was lying exhausted and emaciated on her deathbed.
Around her stood the four of them, now grown-up men and women. The eldest son, in tears, said to her, “Mother, you have always been so good and kind to us. We want to thank you. We’re so proud of you.”
The mother opened her eyes and asked, “Why have you waited so long to tell me that? You never ever said so before.”
She turned her head away and died. – ###
